Monday, January 14, 2008


If you feel unhappy with yourself at certain points in your life, my bet is that you are comparing yourselves to other people, and by doing this, we begin to feel inadequate. Inadequacy can lead you down a dark road if you keep doing what it is that causes you to feel that way. I believe self-esteem and happiness go hand in hand. When you like who you are and are ok with your best, then you will be happy. When you are constantly wishing you had more, and were more, and more like so and so- then you will feel like, whatever you have to give is not enough. Here are some quotes from Flawless! written by: Louis A. Tartaglia. This book was fantastic and I highly recommend it if you are looking for a good, uplifting read. Here is what he has to say about inadequacy:

"Choose inadequacy and lose, or choose self-esteem and fight the fight of your life. You can't be knocked out if you absolutely refuse."

"Go do something with what you have and make things better."

"Something inside knows that you have to make do with what you have, and it is always enough. The regret for not doing all you are capable of will haunt you. "

"Self-esteem is highest in those of us who compare ourselves to others the least. "

These are all quotes by Louis A. Tartaglia.

So, realize that you are enough and that your best is always good enough. Don't compare as different people have different strengths. Someone is always less fortunate and there is always someone more fortunate- in any given area. Focus on what you do have, and not on what you don't and you will continue to see happiness "grow under your feet."


Candy said...

I couldn't agree with you more on this! :o) I guess it's also about learning to accept yourself and making the most of what you have and just let everything else go.

Gretchen said...

I absolutely love the Dalai Lama and this post brings to mind something he said. He says, "On top of this [suffering through aging & death] comes discontentment. You want more and more and more. This, in a sense, is real poverty -- always to be hungry, hungry, hungry, with no time to be satisfied. Others might not be rich but contentment provides them with fewer worries, fewer enemies, fewer problems, and very good sleep." And he goes on.

If you haven't read any of his books, I highly recommend it. A good one to start with might be The Good Heart: A Buddhist Perspective on the Teachings of Jesus Christ. The Art of Happiness is also a great choice.

Bertie said...

Thanks Gretchen- I'll definitely have to check those out!! I love that quote too:)